Are you sitting comfortably?

19th October 2017

"Then we'll begin"

The trek begins...On a grey, wet and dismal morning in Stratford, the seven intrepid cyclists have fuelled up for the first stage of their 220 mile trek to Newbury.

Hancock, Richards and Haliburton can be seen smiling and seemingly keen to get on with it with the promise of a nice warm bath at the end of the day.

With the weather deteriorating over the next three days, they'll be glad they did all those extra miles in training - you did, didn't you?

Ready, Steady... GO!

Charity bike ride

18th October 2017

"West Ham to Swansea"

Lovely weather for training...At 08:00 on Thursday 19th October, seven magnificent, hardy cyclists will set out from West Ham United's ground in Stratford for a 3 day, 220 mile journey to Swansea City's Liberty Stadium ground. It looks like a punishing schedule, which can be found here:

The Magnificent Seven are Peter Hancock, Tony Donkin, Chris Williams, Chris Haliburton, Mark Richards, Tim Crisp and Tim Brooks.

If you would like to donate and find out more about this epic, once in a lifetime bike ride then please visit their fund-rasing page here.

There will be updates as when they get the time to post them during the ride.

Good luck to you all.

The Cheesies

18th October 2017

"Smoggy does Swansea"

Martin "Le Grande Fromage" Boldison is one of two drivers, the other being Steve "Sparky" Parker, chaperoning the seven cyclists doing the charity bike ride. No doubt Smoggy will have some fine anecdotes for his next cheesy news next week and maybe a picture or two of the trip.

Hopefully, they'll get them home safely on Sunday morning.


Chairman's Chirps

18th October 2017

"Not a cheep out of him"

Chirping Jimmy...Obviously with no game last weekend, the Chairman has nothing to chirp about, but there must be other news surely? Maybe the pink stuff he's drinking has affected him.

This is an unusual occurrence, because Jimmy's not usually so reticent. Perhaps the pressures and anxieties of high office have robbed him of the will to chirp. Let's hope not.

Chirping will resume next week.

Clevedon 10 Cullompton 31

7th October 2017

"Scratching their heads"

Team: T.Thie, M.Parslow, B.Williams, C.Maslen, T.Willis, M, A.Cole, J.Williams, B.Largenton, M.Honour(c), B.Bosley, D.Rawle, O.Jones, H.Foley, H.Russell, A.Davis .
Replacements: W.Trollope, B.Stone, C.Tucker. Coaches: N.Hill/C.Heal Flag: N.Tucker

Clevedon on a high!...

This was definitely not a game for the neutrals. They would've seen an error strewn match from both sides and would've wondered what on earth thirty blokes were doing on a grey old day in Clevedon. It was retaining possession that's for sure!

This week in 2016

8th October 2016

Clevedon 67 Chard 5

"Chard burnt at The Vale"

Team: T.Thie, B.Williams, A.Rice, D.Ashfield, H.Butland, K.Hill, M.Lowis, B.Largenton, J.Ford, B.Bosley, T.Statton, W.Trollope, H.Foley, R.Biggins, O.Biggins(c). Replacements: G.Carpenter, C.Maslen, M.Honour. Coaches: N.Hill/C.HealFlag: N.Tucker. Physio: G.Davis. Referee: (Bristol Society)

Kev Weaver: Ben Williams runs try number five...Former Clevedon President, Chairman and Captain Richard Newton (on the right) watches young Ben Williams on his way to a try, in the latest game at The Vale 60 years after he first played there.

Read more here.

The Shining Wit's Forum Week 6

Chairman's Chirps

9th October 2017

"Not qualified to comment"

This should be a short one from me. Having not been at the Cully game I do not feel qualified to comment on it, but from all I have spoken to, the result did not reflect the game. The difference being that they took the majority of their chances and we did not.

Although not much to cheer about on the pitch, we do seem to be doing quite well on the bar and catering front. Well done Martyn the Bar Steward and his crew and well done to all the male and female for punters putting their hard earned into the Club.

I did however, hear some chuntering from various factions, Cobweb Corner and some of the No Necks being included, for Doom Bar to have permanent status in the bar.

...Come on Martyn, you could improve your popularity no end if you gave the members what they wanted and you could give them a black eye for being so militant.

Curly top...A big shout to the duty barman on Saturday, who has changed his hairstyle from short-back-and-sides to a curly wurly top-knot and go no end of stick from everyone - Weave, buy your son a hat!.

More beery, cheery, chirpy-wirpy news next week.

Onlooker's View

7th October 2017

"Very smart indeed"

Well another defeat, but the supporters seem upbeat and willing to support the youngsters and the coaching staff.

It was noted that the chairman was absent, but did arrive in time to see Clevedon's only try - could we have won if he'd watched the whole match ?.

At least this week was a success in one way. The clumsy oaf (own up - who are you?) who had tried to wind in the rope for the past two weeks did not try again this and therefore, the professionals put it away unharmed.

Some how we fielded four teams this week, which is a first for a very long time. The bar obviously profited from this, so long may it continue.

Later on in the clubhouse, Nick Hill was spotted with his adorable wife who was looking as elegant as ever. Nick was attired in a modern day sports jacket, proving that he does have something else to wear apart from the club polo shirt. Very smart indeed.

Goodbye everyone

The Cheesies

10th October 2017

"Ivor the Engine"

Well the action on the pitch wasn't much to write an essay about last Saturday, and it has to be said that the action off the pitch wasn't far behind!!

Ivor the Engine...By far the best move of the weekend was a brilliant blind side surge from some Welsh geezer who appears to have adopted the same name as a cartoon train - Ivor the Engine by all accounts. It was enough to send an Ivor Tingle down the cheese club members' spines as the non-member swooped and hoovered up a mouthful of the assorted curds left open and vulnerable on the table top.

There was however a fleeting moment of panic on his face as he realised he had also munched into one of the fiery hot chilli onions on display, which appeared to turn his mouth into something resembling the firebox on his puffer train.

At least our most diminutive member has returned from the Emerald Isle, which should improve the Guinness sales and liven up proceedings going forward - Welcome back Paddy.

There will be a new cheese making a guest appearance this coming weekend, which should interest him and our Chairman. It's just arrived from across the channel and is currently stinking out Smoggies smeggie fridge. You'll probably smell it before you see it. Let's hope it puts the Welsh bloke off too!!

More Smeggodon news next week.

An evening with Sean Fitzpatrick

14th October 2016

Sean Fitzpatrick Dinner...

A great opportunity to spend an evening in the presence of an All Black Legend. Would be good to get a Clevedon RFC presence at this local event.

Contact Chairman Jim McVeigh if you're interested at Tickets can also be bought direct from Concierge

You can also find Jim in the clubhouse during the week, surrounded by the Cheesy Dips.

Come in No. 7

9th October 2016

I don't suppose many people have noticed the absence of the number seven shirt. This has been the case since the first two minutes of the first game against Okehampton when flanker Joe Ford went of injured after dislocating a shoulder.

No. 7 Joe Ford...As he left the pitch on his way to hospital some callous, heartless and unfeeling individual in the crowd shouted after him "Don't let them cut the shirt off, it's brand new!".

The advice was heard by the unfortunate Joe, but the subsequent gas and air left him unable to speak coherently and the amazing A&E staff cut it off, right up the front.

Thankfully, Joe is recovering and will be for most of the season, but the seven shirt will not be and won't be seen on the pitch again, ever.

Missing Balls

9th October 2016

The Scout hut end is taking it's toll.

No one taps the ball over any more and consequently they end up over the fence in the brambles, never to be seen again.

Sometimes they clear both the Scout hut and the adjoining land and more than likely ending up on a lorry going down Kenn Road.

If you spot a ball that looks forlorn and lonely, please return it to Jeff Durant who will put it back into his ball incubator.

If you'd like to sponsor a ball and donate it to the Scouts, please contact Jim McVeigh at the clubhouse.

The website archives are currently being researched and assembled. They will be available soonish.